Writing Exercise 01: POV
Oct. 23rd, 2007 09:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
maderrSammikins and I came up with this, and I really wanted to give it a try. She suggested Prisoner, for the added challenge of Iah.
So, a writing exercise on POV. The exact same scene from the viewpoint of four different chars. I'm sure I screwed bits up, b/c it was really fsking hard to keep shit straight x_x And this was a really really simple scene, I'm not sure the differences are really al that interesting, but I think starting simple was best. Someday, when I'm less tired and more capable, I shall attempt a trickier scene.
But that's why it's called practice, eh? ^__^
Overall, much fun.
Writing Exercise – POV
One – Dieter
Dieter looked out over the courtyard, which was packed with revelers interested in celebrating in a manner not fit for the ballroom. Most at least were trying to keep to the shadows, but more than a few were not even pretending to try. He snorted in disgust and turned as he heard familiar footsteps behind him. "Beraht."
"Here," Beraht said, thrusting a heavy tankard at him. Steam and their breath misted in the cold night air. Snow had fallen the day before, and more was promised, but for now the world had fallen silent. Beraht shivered and moved closer to him, and Dieter shifted every so slightly.
Beraht looked at him briefly, but said nothing, merely sipped at the contents of his own goblet. Mulled wine, and the smell made Dieter grimace, but so long as he did not taste it overmuch later he did not care. He drank from his own cup, tea made dark and sweet. "Have you been danced to death enough for the evening?"
"I escaped before they could kill me," Beraht replied, sounding tired.
Beside them came the sound of rippling laughter, warm and easy. "Then you had better duck behind the Wolf, Beraht, else my sister will spy you where you currently stand, and drag you back to finish the job."
Making a face, Beraht nevertheless stayed where he was standing just in front of Dieter, with just enough space between them to maintain propriety.
Next to Iah, Sol stirred, releasing his lover's hand and sipping at his own mulled wine. "We were placing bets on when you would finally break free, Beraht."
"At least I make a good show, unlike the rest of you cowards," Beraht retorted. He spoke again after a moment, sounding less vexed. "Iah, of course, is excluded from that epithet."
Dieter snorted. "Who is more the coward, Salharan? The man who refuses to suffer, or the man who is too scared to tell the Queen no?" He grunted when his only reply was a kick to his shin, and glared.
Iah laughed again. "Dieter, she's nice to you. The rest of us are better off hiding or playing along. You're the only one from whom she'll tolerate defiance. Even Mathias grumbles about it."
"The trick is not to show fear," Dieter replied, drinking more of his tea.
Sol and Iah laughed, while Beraht merely rolled his eyes. "Wait until I tell her you dance the Red Waltz, then we will see how you cope," he muttered.
Dieter set his tea on the wide balcony railing and jerked Beraht close, catching his wine before it could spill. "Keep your mouth shut, Salharan, or I will shut it for you."
"Is that a promise or a threat?"
Iah snickered. "They lasted ten minutes."
Sol's mouth quirked in a smile. "Sometimes I think you cheat."
"I was simply determined to win the bet." Iah reached out to touch Sol's cheek, smiling when his hand was captured.
Dieter let go of Beraht in disgust and retrieved his tea, thinking briefly of the days when he could have simply taken all their heads to obtain some peace and quiet.
But Beraht was still standing too close than was strictly proper, and though it was most likely because he claimed Dieter was always hot and Beraht did like to whine about the cold like every other Salharan, Dieter could not muster the energy to start swinging his sword.
Two – Beraht
"Beraht," Dieter said, voice nearly as rough as the weather, but Beraht was long used to that.
Stars above it was cold. He shivered as he drew close enough and thrust the cup he held at Dieter. It had been an impulse, but if the bastard had tea then he wouldn't grouse too much about the fact Beraht was drinking wine. "Here."
The wind was nasty, and he shivered again, wishing he could think of a good reason to slink off to his room – and why in the stars had these chosen to assemble on the balcony of all places? Idiots.
He moved a step closer to Dieter, who was always warm no matter how cold it got. Dieter shifted slightly, and the wind suddenly was not as bad. He looked up, glancing at his lover, whose expression as usual seemed to give nothing away. Beraht sipped his mulled wine, enjoying the flavors – and maybe the fact it would irk Dieter later.
"Have you been danced to death this evening?" Dieter asked, lips curving faintly into a faint hint of smirk.
Beraht ignored it. "I escaped before they could kill me." He would undoubtedly get dragged back inside in a few minutes, a prospect he didn't relish. He'd danced enough for the evening.
Iah laughed, a lazy, friendly sound, not the sort of laughter Beraht would ever grow used to hearing when he was in the room. "Then you had better duck behind the Wolf, Beraht, else my sister will spy you where you currently stand, and drag you back to finish the job."
He grimaced at the thought of being dragged back inside, even if it was warmer there, but could not be bothered to move – except closer to Dieter, and he wanted to finish his wine first.
Next to Iah, Sol finally broke his perpetual silence, letting go of Iah's hand to drink his own wine. "We were placing bets on when you would finally break free, Beraht."
"At least I make a good show, unlike the rest of you cowards," Beraht said. At least he came to these affairs and did more than hid on the balcony. He glanced at Iah, who sat quietly, a faint smile on his face, eyes covered by dark silk. "Iah, of course, is excluded from that epithet." Because he knew if Iah was not blind, and the crowds such a trial, that he would dance.
Dieter gave one his contemptuous snorts. "Who is more the coward, Salharan? The man who refuses to suffer, or the man who is too scared to tell the Queen no?"
Infuriating bastard. Beraht refused to dignify that with a reply, and instead kicked Dieter hard, taking smug pleasure in the grunt that elicited.
More laughter from Iah prevented Dieter from retaliating – for the moment. "Dieter, she's nice to you. The rest of us are better off hiding or playing along. You're the only one from whom she'll tolerate defiance. Even Mathias grumbles about it."
"The trick is not to show fear," Dieter replied, and Beraht just knew he was being smug behind his tea.
He rolled his eyes, ignoring the way Sol and Iah laughed, determined to knock that smugness down. "Wait until I tell her you dance the Red Waltz, then we will see how you cope," he said, taking his own smug pleasure at the warning that flared in Dieter's eyes.
Then Dieter was yanking him close, and Beraht nearly spilled his wine, but then Dieter snatched it away as well, and Beraht realized that while he was in trouble – again – he was also no longer the slightest bit cold. "Keep your mouth shut, Salharan, or I will shut it for you."
"Is that a promise or a threat?" Beraht challenged, shivering in a way that had nothing to do with the chilly air.
Iah's snickering cut into their bickering. "They lasted ten minutes."
He could hear more than see Sol's smile, and the affection that laced it, as he spoke to Iah. "Sometimes I think you cheat."
"I was simply determined to win the bet." From the corner of his eye, Beraht could just see Iah reach out to touch Sol's face, the way Sol caught his hand. It was bizarre, how easy those two were. He could never be so.
Dieter let go of him with a grimace and retrieved his tea.
Smothering a snicker, Beraht retrieved his own wine but otherwise did not move. Dieter was warm, and out on the balcony he could only just hear the music, and so far Esta had not come looking for him, so perhaps he stood a chance of being left alone to enjoy the remainder of the evening with Dieter and their friends.
Three - Sol
Sol stroked Iah's hand, feeling the fine bones of it, how cold it was to the touch – but if the cold was bothering him, Iah gave no indication, and so Sol did not pester him about it. They'd come to escape the crowds for a bit, and Dieter had already occupied it, the balcony his perpetual retreat – in no small part because Beraht invariably found him here when he was finally freed from dancing.
He could hear the crowds below, the strain of music from the ballroom, and it all combined with the mixture of sharp cold and soft wine to make him sleepy.
"Beraht," Dieter said, his gruff voice breaking the lull into which the three of them had fallen.
Beraht all but threw a large tankard at Dieter, not quite looking at him as he did it. "Here."
Dieter took it, expression carefully blank, and Sol almost laughed except he did not feel like finding out what would happen to him if he explained just how amusing it was to watch the two of them attempt to be nice to one another.
It wouldn't last, of course. They'd begin arguing eventually, and one would hit or kick the other.
Fingers tapped the back of his hand, ten quick touches.
Ten minutes, Iah meant.
Sol smirked, and tapped his reply while Dieter spoke.
"Have you been danced to death enough for the evening?"
"I escaped before they could kill me," Beraht replied.
Beside Sol, Iah laughed. It made Sol smile, as always, and he resumed gently stroking Iah's hand. "Then you had better duck behind the Wolf, Beraht, else my sister will spy you where you currently stand, and drag you back to finish the job."
He let go after a moment to reach for his wine, not wanting it to cool before he finished it, and finally spoke, unable to resist joining in the familiar teasing of Beraht for all his dancing. "We were placing bets on when you would finally break free, Beraht."
"At least I make a good show, unlike the rest of you cowards," Beraht said, not quite snapping the words. There was a brief pause, before he added more levelly, "Iah, of course, is excluded from that epithet."
Dieter snorted and spoke, as Sol had known he would, unable to resist provoking. "Who is more the coward, Salharan? The man who refuses to suffer, or the man who is too scared to tell the Queen no?"
He smothered a laugh at the way Beraht responded only by kicking Dieter hard.
Iah did not bother to hide his laughter. "Dieter, she's nice to you. The rest of us are better off hiding or playing along. You're the only one from whom she'll tolerate defiance. Even Mathias grumbles about it."
"The trick is not to show fear," Dieter replied, before taking a generous swallow of tea.
Sol laughed with Iah, amused all the more at the way Beraht rolled his eyes.
"Wait until I tell her you dance the Red Waltz, then we will see how you cope," Beraht finally said, challenging Dieter as only Beraht could – and would.
Dieter moved fast, setting down his tea, yanking Beraht close – and even saving the wine Beraht nearly dropped. Ever impressive, the Wolf. "Keep your mouth shut, Salharan, or I will shut it for you."
Beraht met the threat head on, as fearless as ever when facing his Wolf. "Is that a promise or a threat?"
Iah snickered beside him. ""They lasted ten minutes."
Sol shook his head, conceding defeat. He didn't know why he bothered, somehow Iah always knew how long Beraht and Dieter would last before they fell into arguing – perhaps because Iah made losing rather a pleasant experience. "Sometimes I think you cheat," he said fondly.
"I was simply determined to win the bet," Iah said, and then cool fingers were caressing Sol's cheek. He caught them up in his own much warmer hand, and softly kissed Iah's palm, then held it securely as he settled back to enjoy the night until the cold finally drove them all inside.
Four - Iah
He could hear chatter from below and far to the left – it was distant there, mingling with the strains of music.
Sol's warm fingers stroked his hand, gentle and easy, so very fine. He didn't doubt Sol fretted he was cold, but Sol also knew Iah would speak up if he was.
Dieter shifted slightly from where he stood a few paces away, no doubt glaring down at the crowd below. Iah wondered if anything had changed there, if people still did everything but get naked in the shadows where they could and could not be seen.
He started to ask Sol about the view, when Dieter's voice broke the comfortable silence into which they had fallen.
"Beraht."
Dieter could never be anything but curt – abrupt at best – but something slipped into his voice when Beraht drew near. Iah doubted anyone else heard it.
"Here," Beraht replied, voice just as clipped.
There was only silence, the scuff and rustle as people moved. But he could smell more wine, and tea, and guessed that Beraht had come bearing drinks.
He wondered how long it would take the two of them to start taunting and bickering – Sol was probably thinking the very same thing. Shifting slightly, Iah found Sol's hand where it still rested on the table, tapping lightly on it ten times – ten minutes.
Sol tapped out a reply of twenty as Dieter spoke.
"Have you been danced to death enough for the evening?" Dieter asked, voice mostly taunting, but not entirely.
"I escaped before they could kill me," Beraht replied, a thin thread of exhaustion in his voice.
Iah laughed at his reply, unable to help it, because Beraht should know better than to think he'd actually escaped. "Then you had better duck behind the Wolf, Beraht, else my sister will spy you where you currently stand, and drag you back to finish the job."
Sol let go of his hand and Iah heard him pick up his wine, and if he was cold the sound of Sol's summer voice banished the chill entirely. Always. "We were placing bets on when you would finally break free, Beraht."
"At least I make a good show, unlike the rest of you coward," Beraht replied, tolerant aggravation in his voice. He paused briefly, and said more levelly. "Iah, of course, is excluded from that epithet."
Dieter snorted, and the goading in his tone was unmistakable when he spoke. "Who is more the coward, Salharan?
He heard a rustle of movement, a silence as Beraht refused to respond to the jibe – and Dieter's barely audible grunt. So Beraht had kicked him. Iah laughed. "Dieter, she's nice to you. The rest of us are better off hiding or playing along. You're the only one from whom she'll tolerate defiance. Even Mathias grumbles about it."
"The trick is not to show fear," Dieter replied, and if there was any doubt he was just trying to rile Beraht, it was now firmly banished.
Iah laughed again, and beside him he could hear and feel Sol doing the same.
"Wait until I tell her you dance the Red Waltz, then we will see how you cope," Beraht retorted, a definite rise to Dieter's challenge.
Then all Iah could hear was a flurry of movement, the sound of metal scraping against stone.
"Keep your mouth shut, Salharan, or I will shut it for you," Dieter said, his tone of voice one that sent many a fresh recruit scrambling for cover – but Iah suspected Beraht heard something else entirely in that tone.
"Is that a promise or a threat?" Beraht asked, provoking right back.
Iah snickered and turned slightly toward Sol. ""They lasted ten minutes."
"Sometimes I think you cheat," Sol replied, voice warm and fond.
"I was simply determined to win the bet." He reached out slowly, relieved when he almost immediately found what he sought, stroking Sol's cheek, breath catching when Sol gently took his hand and pressed a soft kiss to the center of his palm.
Sol kept hold of his hand, and Iah was more than content to let him, sitting back in his own chair, content to enjoy the distant sounds and close companionship around him.
So, a writing exercise on POV. The exact same scene from the viewpoint of four different chars. I'm sure I screwed bits up, b/c it was really fsking hard to keep shit straight x_x And this was a really really simple scene, I'm not sure the differences are really al that interesting, but I think starting simple was best. Someday, when I'm less tired and more capable, I shall attempt a trickier scene.
But that's why it's called practice, eh? ^__^
Overall, much fun.
Writing Exercise – POV
One – Dieter
Dieter looked out over the courtyard, which was packed with revelers interested in celebrating in a manner not fit for the ballroom. Most at least were trying to keep to the shadows, but more than a few were not even pretending to try. He snorted in disgust and turned as he heard familiar footsteps behind him. "Beraht."
"Here," Beraht said, thrusting a heavy tankard at him. Steam and their breath misted in the cold night air. Snow had fallen the day before, and more was promised, but for now the world had fallen silent. Beraht shivered and moved closer to him, and Dieter shifted every so slightly.
Beraht looked at him briefly, but said nothing, merely sipped at the contents of his own goblet. Mulled wine, and the smell made Dieter grimace, but so long as he did not taste it overmuch later he did not care. He drank from his own cup, tea made dark and sweet. "Have you been danced to death enough for the evening?"
"I escaped before they could kill me," Beraht replied, sounding tired.
Beside them came the sound of rippling laughter, warm and easy. "Then you had better duck behind the Wolf, Beraht, else my sister will spy you where you currently stand, and drag you back to finish the job."
Making a face, Beraht nevertheless stayed where he was standing just in front of Dieter, with just enough space between them to maintain propriety.
Next to Iah, Sol stirred, releasing his lover's hand and sipping at his own mulled wine. "We were placing bets on when you would finally break free, Beraht."
"At least I make a good show, unlike the rest of you cowards," Beraht retorted. He spoke again after a moment, sounding less vexed. "Iah, of course, is excluded from that epithet."
Dieter snorted. "Who is more the coward, Salharan? The man who refuses to suffer, or the man who is too scared to tell the Queen no?" He grunted when his only reply was a kick to his shin, and glared.
Iah laughed again. "Dieter, she's nice to you. The rest of us are better off hiding or playing along. You're the only one from whom she'll tolerate defiance. Even Mathias grumbles about it."
"The trick is not to show fear," Dieter replied, drinking more of his tea.
Sol and Iah laughed, while Beraht merely rolled his eyes. "Wait until I tell her you dance the Red Waltz, then we will see how you cope," he muttered.
Dieter set his tea on the wide balcony railing and jerked Beraht close, catching his wine before it could spill. "Keep your mouth shut, Salharan, or I will shut it for you."
"Is that a promise or a threat?"
Iah snickered. "They lasted ten minutes."
Sol's mouth quirked in a smile. "Sometimes I think you cheat."
"I was simply determined to win the bet." Iah reached out to touch Sol's cheek, smiling when his hand was captured.
Dieter let go of Beraht in disgust and retrieved his tea, thinking briefly of the days when he could have simply taken all their heads to obtain some peace and quiet.
But Beraht was still standing too close than was strictly proper, and though it was most likely because he claimed Dieter was always hot and Beraht did like to whine about the cold like every other Salharan, Dieter could not muster the energy to start swinging his sword.
Two – Beraht
"Beraht," Dieter said, voice nearly as rough as the weather, but Beraht was long used to that.
Stars above it was cold. He shivered as he drew close enough and thrust the cup he held at Dieter. It had been an impulse, but if the bastard had tea then he wouldn't grouse too much about the fact Beraht was drinking wine. "Here."
The wind was nasty, and he shivered again, wishing he could think of a good reason to slink off to his room – and why in the stars had these chosen to assemble on the balcony of all places? Idiots.
He moved a step closer to Dieter, who was always warm no matter how cold it got. Dieter shifted slightly, and the wind suddenly was not as bad. He looked up, glancing at his lover, whose expression as usual seemed to give nothing away. Beraht sipped his mulled wine, enjoying the flavors – and maybe the fact it would irk Dieter later.
"Have you been danced to death this evening?" Dieter asked, lips curving faintly into a faint hint of smirk.
Beraht ignored it. "I escaped before they could kill me." He would undoubtedly get dragged back inside in a few minutes, a prospect he didn't relish. He'd danced enough for the evening.
Iah laughed, a lazy, friendly sound, not the sort of laughter Beraht would ever grow used to hearing when he was in the room. "Then you had better duck behind the Wolf, Beraht, else my sister will spy you where you currently stand, and drag you back to finish the job."
He grimaced at the thought of being dragged back inside, even if it was warmer there, but could not be bothered to move – except closer to Dieter, and he wanted to finish his wine first.
Next to Iah, Sol finally broke his perpetual silence, letting go of Iah's hand to drink his own wine. "We were placing bets on when you would finally break free, Beraht."
"At least I make a good show, unlike the rest of you cowards," Beraht said. At least he came to these affairs and did more than hid on the balcony. He glanced at Iah, who sat quietly, a faint smile on his face, eyes covered by dark silk. "Iah, of course, is excluded from that epithet." Because he knew if Iah was not blind, and the crowds such a trial, that he would dance.
Dieter gave one his contemptuous snorts. "Who is more the coward, Salharan? The man who refuses to suffer, or the man who is too scared to tell the Queen no?"
Infuriating bastard. Beraht refused to dignify that with a reply, and instead kicked Dieter hard, taking smug pleasure in the grunt that elicited.
More laughter from Iah prevented Dieter from retaliating – for the moment. "Dieter, she's nice to you. The rest of us are better off hiding or playing along. You're the only one from whom she'll tolerate defiance. Even Mathias grumbles about it."
"The trick is not to show fear," Dieter replied, and Beraht just knew he was being smug behind his tea.
He rolled his eyes, ignoring the way Sol and Iah laughed, determined to knock that smugness down. "Wait until I tell her you dance the Red Waltz, then we will see how you cope," he said, taking his own smug pleasure at the warning that flared in Dieter's eyes.
Then Dieter was yanking him close, and Beraht nearly spilled his wine, but then Dieter snatched it away as well, and Beraht realized that while he was in trouble – again – he was also no longer the slightest bit cold. "Keep your mouth shut, Salharan, or I will shut it for you."
"Is that a promise or a threat?" Beraht challenged, shivering in a way that had nothing to do with the chilly air.
Iah's snickering cut into their bickering. "They lasted ten minutes."
He could hear more than see Sol's smile, and the affection that laced it, as he spoke to Iah. "Sometimes I think you cheat."
"I was simply determined to win the bet." From the corner of his eye, Beraht could just see Iah reach out to touch Sol's face, the way Sol caught his hand. It was bizarre, how easy those two were. He could never be so.
Dieter let go of him with a grimace and retrieved his tea.
Smothering a snicker, Beraht retrieved his own wine but otherwise did not move. Dieter was warm, and out on the balcony he could only just hear the music, and so far Esta had not come looking for him, so perhaps he stood a chance of being left alone to enjoy the remainder of the evening with Dieter and their friends.
Three - Sol
Sol stroked Iah's hand, feeling the fine bones of it, how cold it was to the touch – but if the cold was bothering him, Iah gave no indication, and so Sol did not pester him about it. They'd come to escape the crowds for a bit, and Dieter had already occupied it, the balcony his perpetual retreat – in no small part because Beraht invariably found him here when he was finally freed from dancing.
He could hear the crowds below, the strain of music from the ballroom, and it all combined with the mixture of sharp cold and soft wine to make him sleepy.
"Beraht," Dieter said, his gruff voice breaking the lull into which the three of them had fallen.
Beraht all but threw a large tankard at Dieter, not quite looking at him as he did it. "Here."
Dieter took it, expression carefully blank, and Sol almost laughed except he did not feel like finding out what would happen to him if he explained just how amusing it was to watch the two of them attempt to be nice to one another.
It wouldn't last, of course. They'd begin arguing eventually, and one would hit or kick the other.
Fingers tapped the back of his hand, ten quick touches.
Ten minutes, Iah meant.
Sol smirked, and tapped his reply while Dieter spoke.
"Have you been danced to death enough for the evening?"
"I escaped before they could kill me," Beraht replied.
Beside Sol, Iah laughed. It made Sol smile, as always, and he resumed gently stroking Iah's hand. "Then you had better duck behind the Wolf, Beraht, else my sister will spy you where you currently stand, and drag you back to finish the job."
He let go after a moment to reach for his wine, not wanting it to cool before he finished it, and finally spoke, unable to resist joining in the familiar teasing of Beraht for all his dancing. "We were placing bets on when you would finally break free, Beraht."
"At least I make a good show, unlike the rest of you cowards," Beraht said, not quite snapping the words. There was a brief pause, before he added more levelly, "Iah, of course, is excluded from that epithet."
Dieter snorted and spoke, as Sol had known he would, unable to resist provoking. "Who is more the coward, Salharan? The man who refuses to suffer, or the man who is too scared to tell the Queen no?"
He smothered a laugh at the way Beraht responded only by kicking Dieter hard.
Iah did not bother to hide his laughter. "Dieter, she's nice to you. The rest of us are better off hiding or playing along. You're the only one from whom she'll tolerate defiance. Even Mathias grumbles about it."
"The trick is not to show fear," Dieter replied, before taking a generous swallow of tea.
Sol laughed with Iah, amused all the more at the way Beraht rolled his eyes.
"Wait until I tell her you dance the Red Waltz, then we will see how you cope," Beraht finally said, challenging Dieter as only Beraht could – and would.
Dieter moved fast, setting down his tea, yanking Beraht close – and even saving the wine Beraht nearly dropped. Ever impressive, the Wolf. "Keep your mouth shut, Salharan, or I will shut it for you."
Beraht met the threat head on, as fearless as ever when facing his Wolf. "Is that a promise or a threat?"
Iah snickered beside him. ""They lasted ten minutes."
Sol shook his head, conceding defeat. He didn't know why he bothered, somehow Iah always knew how long Beraht and Dieter would last before they fell into arguing – perhaps because Iah made losing rather a pleasant experience. "Sometimes I think you cheat," he said fondly.
"I was simply determined to win the bet," Iah said, and then cool fingers were caressing Sol's cheek. He caught them up in his own much warmer hand, and softly kissed Iah's palm, then held it securely as he settled back to enjoy the night until the cold finally drove them all inside.
Four - Iah
He could hear chatter from below and far to the left – it was distant there, mingling with the strains of music.
Sol's warm fingers stroked his hand, gentle and easy, so very fine. He didn't doubt Sol fretted he was cold, but Sol also knew Iah would speak up if he was.
Dieter shifted slightly from where he stood a few paces away, no doubt glaring down at the crowd below. Iah wondered if anything had changed there, if people still did everything but get naked in the shadows where they could and could not be seen.
He started to ask Sol about the view, when Dieter's voice broke the comfortable silence into which they had fallen.
"Beraht."
Dieter could never be anything but curt – abrupt at best – but something slipped into his voice when Beraht drew near. Iah doubted anyone else heard it.
"Here," Beraht replied, voice just as clipped.
There was only silence, the scuff and rustle as people moved. But he could smell more wine, and tea, and guessed that Beraht had come bearing drinks.
He wondered how long it would take the two of them to start taunting and bickering – Sol was probably thinking the very same thing. Shifting slightly, Iah found Sol's hand where it still rested on the table, tapping lightly on it ten times – ten minutes.
Sol tapped out a reply of twenty as Dieter spoke.
"Have you been danced to death enough for the evening?" Dieter asked, voice mostly taunting, but not entirely.
"I escaped before they could kill me," Beraht replied, a thin thread of exhaustion in his voice.
Iah laughed at his reply, unable to help it, because Beraht should know better than to think he'd actually escaped. "Then you had better duck behind the Wolf, Beraht, else my sister will spy you where you currently stand, and drag you back to finish the job."
Sol let go of his hand and Iah heard him pick up his wine, and if he was cold the sound of Sol's summer voice banished the chill entirely. Always. "We were placing bets on when you would finally break free, Beraht."
"At least I make a good show, unlike the rest of you coward," Beraht replied, tolerant aggravation in his voice. He paused briefly, and said more levelly. "Iah, of course, is excluded from that epithet."
Dieter snorted, and the goading in his tone was unmistakable when he spoke. "Who is more the coward, Salharan?
He heard a rustle of movement, a silence as Beraht refused to respond to the jibe – and Dieter's barely audible grunt. So Beraht had kicked him. Iah laughed. "Dieter, she's nice to you. The rest of us are better off hiding or playing along. You're the only one from whom she'll tolerate defiance. Even Mathias grumbles about it."
"The trick is not to show fear," Dieter replied, and if there was any doubt he was just trying to rile Beraht, it was now firmly banished.
Iah laughed again, and beside him he could hear and feel Sol doing the same.
"Wait until I tell her you dance the Red Waltz, then we will see how you cope," Beraht retorted, a definite rise to Dieter's challenge.
Then all Iah could hear was a flurry of movement, the sound of metal scraping against stone.
"Keep your mouth shut, Salharan, or I will shut it for you," Dieter said, his tone of voice one that sent many a fresh recruit scrambling for cover – but Iah suspected Beraht heard something else entirely in that tone.
"Is that a promise or a threat?" Beraht asked, provoking right back.
Iah snickered and turned slightly toward Sol. ""They lasted ten minutes."
"Sometimes I think you cheat," Sol replied, voice warm and fond.
"I was simply determined to win the bet." He reached out slowly, relieved when he almost immediately found what he sought, stroking Sol's cheek, breath catching when Sol gently took his hand and pressed a soft kiss to the center of his palm.
Sol kept hold of his hand, and Iah was more than content to let him, sitting back in his own chair, content to enjoy the distant sounds and close companionship around him.
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 02:14 am (UTC)I love the disicntion between the two relationships; Iah and Sol are really comfortable with each other, and Dieter and Beraht are sorta awkward and not used to showing affection; It makes me sqeel at how well you do it too. :3
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 02:15 am (UTC)^__^ Cool. Glad I didn't bungle it totally.
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 02:27 am (UTC)That said (^^;) It was really good, and really cool. You handle Iah's blindness so well, and the different personalities and how they view things and... stuff. ^^; Yeah. ^.^ I like. <3
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 02:41 am (UTC)Sol and Iah are adorable. ^___^ And I love Beraht and Deiter with their snarky, snappish words that mean more than the tone and words actually do. ... yeah, I think that makes sense.
And now I'm going to go run off because I really shouldn't be reading/commenting on this when I haven't managed to read/comment on the main story. ^___^;;
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 02:43 am (UTC)*laugh* Yeah, reading this without reading Prisoner, I'm not sure how much you'd get, but eh. I'm still behind on some of your stuffs <3
Sweet dreams!
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 04:01 am (UTC)Liked the different interpetation of motives for each preceiver. Not just a respeaking from different perspectives but the underlying currents as well. dieter being in love doesn't love the mulled wine of his lover but puts up with it. So real and richer.
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 04:20 am (UTC)Hm, maybe I'll try this... Thanks for the idea!
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 07:02 am (UTC)And Dieter, oh my Dieter. You rogue, you scoundrel. You incredibly hawt, manly, sexy, sexy man, whose cheekbones who I imagine are like razors.
But soft! What light through yonder window breaks?
It is the East, and Dieter is the sun!
Bill Shakespeare rolls in his grave.
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 01:30 pm (UTC)And Sol's observations were so much about Iah, even though the 'action' wasn't about him. That is just so him. And them. *dreamy sigh*
And Beraht... well, his observations were mostly all about himself. Or others in relation to him. It was bizarre, how easy those two were. He could never be so. As it should be. ^___^
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 09:20 pm (UTC)The line that tickled me both was 'it was so funny to watch those two try to be nice to each other'.
no subject
Date: 2007-10-24 11:10 pm (UTC)*tackle hearts* Much love for all four of them, though. ^____^
Also, Beraht kicking Dieter made me giggle like mad. XD Heehee!!!
no subject
Date: 2007-10-26 11:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-10-27 06:47 am (UTC)oh well.... Looking forward to the stories you didn't finish writing like "Black magic" among other things.
reguest
Date: 2008-02-02 09:56 pm (UTC)Re: reguest
Date: 2008-02-02 10:00 pm (UTC)The whole story should be on my LJ. Uh, what's your email? Can you open pdfs?