website and writing
Sep. 5th, 2005 03:05 pmFinaly updated the beast. Urgh. I just know I did fifty bajillion things wrong, so the pointing out of errors would be appreciated. Those of you who recently submitted challenges, I'm sorry it took me so long - if you don't mind, double check the challenge page and make sure I got all your info correct.
Added bunches of stuff that needed to go up a while ago. For those of you who care, I also added the next two parts of Dance With the Devil:
Case # 322: Family Matters
Case # 134: Sweet Dreams*
If you prefer I put them on LJ, drop me a line and I shall ^_^
All right, now I have to update fp.net, as I have a few devoted fans there who are worth the hassle of the place.
*still needs beta'ing, but I wanted to have them both up today before I left, so pardon the errors.
Added bunches of stuff that needed to go up a while ago. For those of you who care, I also added the next two parts of Dance With the Devil:
Case # 322: Family Matters
Case # 134: Sweet Dreams*
If you prefer I put them on LJ, drop me a line and I shall ^_^
All right, now I have to update fp.net, as I have a few devoted fans there who are worth the hassle of the place.
*still needs beta'ing, but I wanted to have them both up today before I left, so pardon the errors.
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Date: 2005-09-05 08:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-05 08:28 pm (UTC)<3 Thanks, Star ^_^
The funny thing about Devil is that I'm writing *all* of the ten stories at once. I write different bits at a time - the second story I started first (that's the part you read before) but I wound up finishing it after I wrote the preceding piece, so the betas haven't had a chance to do more than approve it.
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Date: 2005-09-05 09:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-05 10:02 pm (UTC)That's just weird. I bet I forgot to upload the new page, hang on. Thanks ^_^
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Date: 2005-09-05 10:04 pm (UTC)Try now.
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Date: 2005-09-05 10:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-05 10:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-05 11:31 pm (UTC)...by "beta-ing," you mean adding on with what happens at the dinner, right? Because that is an evil, evil place to leave off. And yet appropriate. *sigh* I guess I could just use my imagination.
But, yes, wonderful. I especially liked that bit Douglas threw in at the end about Chris' parents. Really can't wait for more now!
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Date: 2005-09-05 11:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-06 02:55 am (UTC)I love you! *love, love, love*
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Date: 2005-09-06 03:26 am (UTC)I absolutely adore Sable and Christian!
waitaminute... I adore all your characters...
urk.
134: Search for 'Tony' because you called Tommy Tony in there. Also in the first description of the troll, you just said 'eight, Troll' rather than eight foot tall.
Ohh... but these stories are good!
*laughs* Philippa! I can't believe she went for him! I can't wait till she meets Sable, well, actually, realizes that Sable is the man who has claimed Chris.
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Date: 2005-09-06 03:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-06 04:56 am (UTC).... in fact, I think I'm gonna go read that first one again. Bed can wait. Must go squee over the cuteness that is Chris's pumpkin amulet and Sable's teasing over the invoking of Consort status. ^__________^
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Date: 2005-09-06 09:20 am (UTC)Heh. Thanks. I'll fix those when I get home tonight ^_^
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Date: 2005-09-06 02:13 pm (UTC)I really love the way you have Chris's background all worked out too. Poor guy, having so many conflicting things going on in his family. I want to kick his grandmother, but at the same time, you do an excellent job conveying that it's not a straight forward clear cut thing and that there are so many shades of gray. It's easy to understand her side of it and it's easy to get his too.
Oh, and much love for Sable because he makes me laugh. XD Poor Chris didn't stand a chance with that one.
You rock! *tackle huggle glomps*
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Date: 2005-09-06 03:13 pm (UTC)Cordula says ""I first visited Tony a year ago, and..." But then she says his name is Tommy Fitz, and she called him Tommy earlier as well.
"One night, short term long term or permanent... I think you might want to put a comma in between short term and long term to help that sentence become a littler clearer.
And there the street went spinning again. "Then" might work better than "there".
In the paragraph where you describe Cordula, try switching the sentence about her lips and teeth to after the sentence describing her eyes and nose. You might even want to try and fit it at the end of the paragraph. It is a tiny thing, but it adds a bit more to the incongruity of her fangs if you have the more harmless descriptions bundled together. It also brings more emphasis to the next paragraph about her being a succubus, Which I think needs to go up with this paragraph instead of starting the one where she asks for Chris' help.
...“Because they’re quality magic conductors and demons only tolerate the best of everything?” He paused, blinking. “Wow, he must really like you.” I'm sorry, but I was unable to see the link between what Doug said and the realization he came to. Does he say it because he just realized what he said earlier about it being a big diamond and that it has high levels of power stored in it means? Maybe add a few words or a sentence to clarify that?
..."The love interest has to be real... There are two ways one can take this comment. The way I took it was that the love itself has to be real, meaning Cordula's love or Tommy's love wasn't real. It wasn't until I read further that I realized you meant that the loved one has to be physical in the world rather than corporeal (or astral, I'm not sure what the difference would be).
...stay the hell out of cases.” "my" cases might work better.
One last thing, the blue sweater. It isn't mentioned anywhere why Sable accepts this as payment. Maybe if you add how nice Chris looks in it. Or has Sable seen him in it before? Maybe the last time they had dinner? (If this happens in another case file that you haven't posted yet, then forget this comment. ^_^ )
And I want to know what Sable says when Chris asks him what he means by "for keeps". Because I'm curious as to just when Sable decided to make Chris his consort!!! ^_____^
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Date: 2005-09-06 04:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-06 04:43 pm (UTC)I should add you to my beta-filter. Thanks ^_^ I'll take care of these when I get home.
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Date: 2005-09-06 04:44 pm (UTC)Heh. Just don't blame me when you're late turning it in XD
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Date: 2005-09-06 05:03 pm (UTC)Actually, there is one other thing that I was curious about, but it has nothing to do with any corrections. When Chris passes out does Sable let the twelve-year old fall from Chris' arms, or does he catch both of them? ^____^
No, actually, I was wondering if he was worried about Chris passing out, or did he not know that someone had cast a spell on Chris?