Time to Vent
Mar. 4th, 2004 09:33 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
maderrI'm tired of the fucking jabs about my always being on the computer. Tired of it. Especially when my time on said computer is spent trying to shape my future. Yes, I'm always here. No, it's NOT FUNNY when jokes are made about my ass being glued to it. Pretend for two fucking minutes that I'm trying to build a website, that I have no idea how to do so but am desperately trying to learn.
Also pretend that to write my stories I have to be on the computer to type them. There's no choice in this. Yes, I can write by hand. But in order to post them I need to - oh gee - type them on the fucking computer.
While we're pretending, let's imagine I'm also paying bills that I can barely manage, trying to find a new job and looking into how best to print the stories that I fantasize about seeing in print.
Speaking of my writing. I think I'm a good writer, but I don't consider myself a stunning one. Not yet, anyway. But I take it seriously enough that I'm getting sick of people just brushing it aside. I don't mean to ignore my friends but do you know how hard it is to try and write when you have people chatting at you nonstop? It's impossible. This applies to people on and off line. Especially when after talking to me for hours on end they want to know how the writing goes. It's hard to write when you have to give all your attention to the speaker.
I'm mostly mad right now at a certain rl person who couldnt' say "can I use the computer" or "do you mind if take the comp." No, it's "after this I'm taking it." I don't mind sharing, but don't fucking order me around. JUST ASK IT'S NOT THAT HARD. Especially as it's my computer.
I'm being unfair, I know I am. But I wanted to get a lot done today and I got ZILCH done. Because people were talking and my writing is always second place.
Edit: This makes it sound like I don't want to talk to my friends. Which isn't true. My major dilemna is that I want to tal to them, but I can never get away with just an hour or two. So before I realize it my entire day is gone and I've accomplished nothing. I guess mostly I'm mad at myself, because that's really the only person I can blame here. Nargh, I hate being short tempered. I need a babysitter. Sammie always kept me in check, but she had to go to Russia. Damn you Rykaine!
Also pretend that to write my stories I have to be on the computer to type them. There's no choice in this. Yes, I can write by hand. But in order to post them I need to - oh gee - type them on the fucking computer.
While we're pretending, let's imagine I'm also paying bills that I can barely manage, trying to find a new job and looking into how best to print the stories that I fantasize about seeing in print.
Speaking of my writing. I think I'm a good writer, but I don't consider myself a stunning one. Not yet, anyway. But I take it seriously enough that I'm getting sick of people just brushing it aside. I don't mean to ignore my friends but do you know how hard it is to try and write when you have people chatting at you nonstop? It's impossible. This applies to people on and off line. Especially when after talking to me for hours on end they want to know how the writing goes. It's hard to write when you have to give all your attention to the speaker.
I'm mostly mad right now at a certain rl person who couldnt' say "can I use the computer" or "do you mind if take the comp." No, it's "after this I'm taking it." I don't mind sharing, but don't fucking order me around. JUST ASK IT'S NOT THAT HARD. Especially as it's my computer.
I'm being unfair, I know I am. But I wanted to get a lot done today and I got ZILCH done. Because people were talking and my writing is always second place.
Edit: This makes it sound like I don't want to talk to my friends. Which isn't true. My major dilemna is that I want to tal to them, but I can never get away with just an hour or two. So before I realize it my entire day is gone and I've accomplished nothing. I guess mostly I'm mad at myself, because that's really the only person I can blame here. Nargh, I hate being short tempered. I need a babysitter. Sammie always kept me in check, but she had to go to Russia. Damn you Rykaine!
