Random Musings

[maderr]

So after watching Samurai Champloo, my mind has been stuck on wondering what sort of whack combinations could be made to work. I mean you wouldn't immediately put Samurai with hip-hop - but Watanabe (sp?) makes it work.

My thoughts have been locked on that for the past several days, and those thoughts brought me 'round to an old favorite - cliches.

And whenever I think of cliches, I think of my Ultimate Archnemis:

Vampires. I hate vampire stories, will not read them unless they come highly recommended by a handful of peeps or I'm in the mood for self-mutilation of the brain.

Anyway. This loops back to weird combos. Why do vampires always go after pansies and nancy boys? I mean seriously, let's think about this.

Go with Rice vampires, b/c they're more or less the Textbook Example of Been Done to Death Vampires. They're all whiny, prissy bitches. Even Armand, though I loved the boy to death when I still like Anne Rice, tended to be sniveling and whiny and bitchy. So why do they always go after other nancy boys? Why does any vampire go after the bratty little fops?

Seriously. It's a bit like always eating junk food isn't it? Gets boring, every now and then don't you think they'd want real food? I mean Lestat taught everyone to just kill criminals and stuff, but that's not really much different from junk food, I should think.

So. I'm a vampire. What sort of 'meat' would I want?

Cowboys might be fun. A little tough, yeah, but not only would they have good blood - they'd put up a hell of a fight. Nice steak made on the grill at home instead of a burger bought at the King.

I think it would be pretty cool - Vampires in the old, wild west. If I knew shit about the old west, I'd be all over it. Sounds loads more interesting than Embrace (and don't you lot even start. I should hand that story over to someone who likes Vamps, I swear. Maybe I should start over and make it more cohesive...blargh. That story terrifies me, you have no idea).

How much ludicrous fun would that be? Hot!Angsty!Loner!Gunslinger is harassed by Cocky!Sheriff who is actually a vampire. Or maybe Sheriff hits on a lonely little cowboy who's looking to settle down rather than ride with the herd...or should the cowboy be the vamp? And the sheriff the victim? That would be hot too...but I dunno, somehow I like the sheriff. It would be harder to do, since he's stable rather than a wanderer...hmm...it would have to be the cowboy I guess. Except that being out on the range, he'd have a hard time getting food since it's bad policy to feed on his comrades.

What's a good name for a vampire old west sheriff? Ralph? *snerk* Maybe not.

Okay, that's it. I'm not getting into this. I know zilch about the old west (though more than I like about vampires) and have too much to do already. I don't think I could keep a straight face long enough, anyway.

And no, I haven't been drinking. But that's about to change, because Ralph Sheriff needs to be erased from my head.

Comments

[white_aster]

^____^ I'm all about the cracked out combos of genres. Wild West cowboy vampires would rock. Though I have to agree that a sheriff vamp would be hard to pull off, unless vamps are accepted. I mean, the whole daylight thing. Same, really, for the cowboy. Either way, they're daytime occupations.... But an alternate universe where vamps are accepted or at least uneasily coexisting? That would rock. :)

[maderr.livejournal.com]

Ah, see, daylight was something else I neglected to account for. Either that particular problem would have to be nonexistant, or yeah - a place where vamps are excepted.

Darn it, you people are so entirely not helping me not write this. :P

[white_aster]

Ah, see, daylight was something else I neglected to account for. Either that particular problem would have to be nonexistant, or yeah - a place where vamps are excepted.

Darn it, you people are so entirely not helping me not write this. :P

:blithely ignoring that last: So, we're talking either radical change of environment (or not just cowboy vampires, SPACE ALIEN COWBOY VAMPIRES ON THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON! ^_______^), or...hmmm...you know, I think that they'd have to have some mega-adapted cows for this to work, too. I mean, cows aren't normally nocturnal, either, and I'm not sure how they'd take to the turn-around in activity, if vamps are trying to herd them at night.... Hmm...must cogitate on this....

[maderr.livejournal.com]

SPACE ALIEN COWBOY VAMPIRES ON THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON

*falls off chair laughing*

Well, I wonder. How necessary is it that vamps can't go around in daylight? If you nix that, not too much else would need to be tweaked.

But you're right, this needs pondering.

[kiyoshi-chan.livejournal.com]

How necessary is it that vamps can't go around in daylight?

It depends on how much you want to follow the old cliche. I believe salt, silver, running water and fire (the sun) all have cleansing purposes, because the concept is that vampire = undead = evil, which is why they have to avoid these things, the important one being "evil" there. (Then again, I've read stuff where running water is a type of landmark, nothing more, so... But, well, just giving you suggestions.) What I'm trying to say is that if your vampire is "sanctioned" by Good, maybe...? Some kind of vampire God-appointed vigilante, who became a vampire because God wanted him to?

Oh man, sorry, I'm just going to sit in this corner laughing my butt off. I believe we'd make the Christians SO pissed off at us.

[kiyoshi-chan.livejournal.com]

Oh, and if you want a practical reason why he can move about in sunlight, you might say that if he's appointed by Good forces, possibly to hunt other vampires, he's going to need the advantage of extra time. Which would assume that humans might not know about vampires or be able to kill them on their own, which is why divine intervention is required?

Oh, and if he's not /evil/, would the animals still react /badly/? Keyword being 'badly' now.

...Uh, yeah, shutting up now.

[maderr.livejournal.com]

I think I'd like to keep matters simpler than that. But the idea has merrit.

[white_aster]

Well, s'true, you could always nix the no daylight thing. I mean, just about any part except the drinking blood part can and has been dropped if required. And oh, something else I forgot to mention, re: the cowboy finding it hard to find some nourishment on the range...dude....COWS. I mean, it's MRE's rather than sheriff!steak, but still....

Oh man, now you've got ME thinking about it...and you know, Torquere Press has a Cowboy Up anthology that's open for submissions.... (http://www.torquerepress.com/submissions/anthologies.html ). Argh, they're looking for 10k-14k words by May 15th...don't think I could manage that...rats...a bitty space alien cowboy vampire story I could do, but not something that big....

[maderr.livejournal.com]

10k is quite a chunk. We should see what we can do.

I'm going to start giggling in the middle of work tomorrow because of this and my coworkers will only be reaffirmed in theier beliefs that I'm stark raving mad.