*evil grin*

[maderr]

Cleaning up, I discovered jolena left her bag of ribbons and jewelry here.

I'll start the bidding at five dollars.

I have $12.50. Do I have $13.00?

Do I have $14.00?

Do I have $23.00?

Do I hear $30.00?!

Thirty Three?

Do I have $40.00?

And all bidders please note, bidding ends at 5:00 pm EST

Do I hear $100.00?

Bidding is up to $350.39. Do I hear $355.00?

Fifteen minute warning, bidders.

Five minute warning

BIDDING CLOSED. And in a surprise last minute bid, the goods go to jolena for $1000.00

I accept currency in US $, good fiction or porn. Please send by the end of the week. Thank you for bidding and have a nice day.

Comments

[jolena.livejournal.com]

Mmm, lawyers. The breakfast of champions.

[maderr.livejournal.com]

LMAO

[jolena.livejournal.com]

Just make sure they're pudgy. The thin ones have NO meat.

[starparty.livejournal.com]

Ug. Stringy Filet of Laywer is nasty!

[jolena.livejournal.com]

Completely un-eatable.

[starparty.livejournal.com]

You really have to watch where you buy your laywer. The grocery store just can't get the quality cuts in. You have to go to a speciality shop to get the good stuff.

[rykaine.livejournal.com]

The smaller firms are the best. The meat is a lot younger, which lends to a lot more fat, which lends to much juiciness.

[starparty.livejournal.com]

Personally I like interns when it comes to the younger meat. And if you are lucky it's already marinaded when you get it!

[rykaine.livejournal.com]

True. But they're so delicate at that age. It's very easy to screw it up.

[jolena.livejournal.com]

Oh, I just grab them right out of the court room and butcher them myself. Its my beleif that all animals are best when taken straight from the wild.

[rykaine.livejournal.com]

hahaha! Good point. Like hunting veldt. Only with more traps.

[starparty.livejournal.com]

See I've had a few nasty experiences with the Baliffs. If you can bag one they are good eating but they *FIGHT*. But if I'm going for wild meat I usually look in the bars around the courtroom. You can usually pick a few up in a night if you are lucky.

[starparty.livejournal.com]

Bwahhahah!

Breaded and Fried?

[jolena.livejournal.com]

No, baked with carrots and potatoes. And the eyeballs are absolutely perfect in ice cream.

[starparty.livejournal.com]

oooh! Yum! Now do you use their own juices to baste them or do you make a gravy beforehand?

[jolena.livejournal.com]

Their own juices. I'm miserable with gravies. Besides, if you regularly brush the blood over them, they get this wonderful tangy flavor.

[starparty.livejournal.com]

Oh and I'll bet that does wonders for their color! Keeping them locked in the basement for months just leaches the tan right out and that pale fishy color is just so unappetizing. And tangy is good! Now do you stuff them with a standard dressing?

[jolena.livejournal.com]

Yeah, just the basics. I find most of the fancier kinds just make their heads swell.

[starparty.livejournal.com]

And lord know lawyers can't afford to get a much larger head! Do you add the gizzards?

[rykaine.livejournal.com]

mmm... with mashed tater?

[starparty.livejournal.com]

oooh that'd be good! jolena was talking about using the eyeballs on ice cream so we just need a vegetable.

[rykaine.livejournal.com]

brocoli?

[starparty.livejournal.com]

Hmm I dunno. Do you thing we can pass the brains off as cauliflower?

Waste not want not after all.

[rykaine.livejournal.com]

Oh, definitely. Boil it just right, and I'm sure it would work just well. We can make a salad of it!

[starparty.livejournal.com]

And I bet with the right support we can use the leftover hands as a set of salad tongs!